Monthly Archives: January 2010
Thats how I feel like I’m living right now… just out of reach of something wonderful…something huge… something life altering… and I think if I look long enough… that fuzzy “What-cha-ma-call-it” will come into focus and the haze will lift, and I’ll be right on time.
But for now, the haze is showing up… even here… so my Tuesday post will be a “Not Me Monday” because the words… well.. the laptop… stayed just out of my reach last night until bedtime, and then… well it’s cuddle time… not blogging time.
When I was surfing around yesterday, I followed link through link through link to find MckMama and her Not Me! Monday posts! I LOVED them… so… I thought I’d do one… Maybe recap the highlights of the week… so… here goes!
Last Sunday ( I know it’s a while ago, but… I hold a grudge sometimes… ) when McHubby hung up the phone and announced that his ex wife asked him to tell me she said “Hi”, I Did Not give the cordless phone the finger…. really!!! and then I Did Not sulk about it for a couple of hours, letting her get to me in that special way only she can.
Monday I Did Not pull extra covers from McHubby so he would wake up and cuddle into me in that way that I love, and don’t know how I EVER lived without.
Munchkin Did Not lose 3 spelling books in ONE week, and I DID NOT go out and buy new ones each time so he wouldn’t fall behind, only to have him find the 3 books on Friday.
On Thursday I Did Not go to work with McHubby and file his mountain of work for him, and “borrow” the office copy of Adobe Photoshop and another referrence program and install them on my laptop. (hee hee)
Friday McHubby Did Not work from home, and I Did Not turn into some selfish beast I’d never seen before because he had to actually do work.
Saturday I Did Not take the pooper on a 2 hour walk and a 3 hour car ride just because I felt guilty for not taking him for a walk in … a LONG time.
Sunday morning I Did Not get upset when McHubby said he was going to talk to this person who seemed to be purposely going out of her way to be rude to me. AND I Did Not secretly love the fact that he saw it… that it wasn’t in my head!!
Sunday afternoon I Did Not go see a highschool play just because I think McEldest lied about going to see it, and then we could ask him his favorite part, etc. I Did NOT obsess about all the little pink girls running around, I Did Not count the 26 little sparkley pink one’s and think about them till my uterus ached.
Last night I Did Not lay on the couch for 3 hours watching mindless TV (Including 2 hours of wrestling) while there was a TON of stuff to do.
And this AM? Well this AM, I Will Not be late to take the Munchkin to school because I “had” to blog first, I Will Not obsess about the frying pan full of bacon grease I stuck in the cupboard when I found it in the stove last night, which McHubby put there so the dog wouldn’t burn his tongue, I WILL NOT finally fold the 5 baskets of clean laundry waiting to be folded.
But most importantly I WILL NOT crawl back into bed, cuddle into McHubby’s pillow and dream my day away.
(a) freedom of conscience and religion;
(b) freedom of thought, belief, opinion and expression, including freedom of the press and other media of communication;
(c) freedom of peaceful assembly; and
(d) freedom of association.
NOT that there’s anything wrong with that… ( I just want to put it out there.. because I DON’T want to make it onto any watch lists…. )
Here… it’s different.
Sally Hansen, how brilliant you are!! (Even if I had the idea LONG before this!) When I was in highschool, I used white out pens to draw on my nails. I always thought I was ahead of my time.. I love these, and already own 5!!
Meet Welches Grape Jelly….
Why did no one tell me such a thing exsisted?? It comes out like ketchup!!! We’ve made sammy after sammy with this already!!! I LOVE it, and can’t wait to see if they have more kinds when we grocery shop next!!
Wow… I think I hit the top of the emotional scale last night… or… the bottom… whatever the worst would be, that was me!!! I think my body has started to prepare itself for little Miss Princess (Or His Royal Highness) because I am the emotional equivalent of a 22 month pregnant elephant! Add into that a little PMS, and I’m surprised McHubby came home from work last night without full protective gear!
McHubby and I, we were occasional extended weekend guests at his abode (thats the fancy way to say we shacked up for a bit) so we’re not strangers to living with each other. Most people I know say their biggest adjustment after getting married, was getting used to the other person always being there. We THRIVE on that. Knowing at the end of a day here by myself, he’ll come home, we’ll spend time together and then fall asleep in each others arms, thats what keeps me going! I LOVE his always being here!! and I’d like to think he loves that I am here too!
But anyemo… We’re kind of going through this stage… I think about him… a lot… and I try to make things easier for him, because I know he’s working 10 hour days, and that when he gets home he’s exhausted! I, on the other hand, am here all day. Watching HDBravo, and getting involved in more reality shows then I even knew existed!! So… when it comes to getting things done around the house, I like to try and get it done before he comes home so that a) He can relax and not have to help me and b) so that its not time we could be spent chatting together or something that we’re out doing other things like I’m vacuuming while he’s changing light bulbs.
But.. inevitably, something will happen. The dog will grab something while I’m not paying attention, or the Real Housewives of Orange County will have a meltdown, and something I planned to get done doesn’t get done. And I feel bad. So when McHubby comes home, I hug him and usually end up saying something like “I forgot to make the bed!! I’m sorry!” Because I’ve been here all day… eating Mac and Cheese out of the pot, and I could have had it done, and then he wouldn’t have to… and I feel guilty.
So last night, after apology number who-knows, and emotional crying fit number 30-infinity, McHubby and I lay it out. My apologizing makes him feel bad, like that he’s some mean task-master and I am trying to get everything done FOR him. He likes helping around the house, and he hates it when I run around doing stuff and leave him with nothing to do but sit there. I NEVER looked at it that way!! and when I tell him sorry? It makes him feel worse!! I get it!! I really do!! And I Promised him I’d work on it.
But I said WE were going through this stage. What is his stage? He’s worried that I wont be happy here. That I’ll resent moving, that I’ll be bored in the house all day, or bored when he gets home to tired to do anything.
What he doesn’t know is that I LOVE being here. I don’t know anyone, I don’t drive, and don’t know the transit system, I don’t have a job, or money, but I wake up every morning with my husband. I help get our kids off to school, and I putter around the house, cleaning up after the kids, and getting stuff done around the house. I LOVE cleaning up the dining room table after we’ve played cards, because it’s something we’ve done together as a family. That I love tracking down the Xbox controllers, because I loved watching out kids play together the night before.
What he doesn’t realize, is being here, with him, is exactly what I’ve wanted for half my lifetime! That being here makes me happier then I’ve ever been, or that my saddest moment here, I’m still happier then I’ve ever been.
What he doesn’t realize is how incredible, loving, funny, smart, cute, caring, adorable he is! and how happy he makes me EVERY single day with just a smile, a touch or a kiss.
So… to avoid another emo-incident like last night, I promise the following to myself! (and to McHubby when he reads this)
I promise to not spend my day sitting in our bedroom, but to go out and spend time in the rest of the house, like the living room.
I promise to leave the kitchen floor till McHubby comes home, because it REALLY is a job I hate!
I promise to shower rather then watch that last episode of launch my line (that’s why they invented TiVo, right?)
I promise to NOT clean the kids rooms today. It’s ok for them to have rooms that look… like normal kids rooms.
I promise NOT to change the lightbulbs.
I promise not to bore you guys with any more long posts! 😛
Dear Mr Storke,
I’ve unpacked the guest room! It’s nice, neat, warm and cozy. I would love it if in your travels, you’d stop by. Just for a night or two. That’s all… just long enough. I promise to make your favorite meal… whatever that might be… and not even screw up my face when you eat it. I thought you and I understood each other when we met the other day at the zoo. You remember… I was the crazy lady, talking to you for what seemed like forever, and you were the bird… ignoring me?
I know I asked for this Christmas time, but you were busy, and I understand how things can get left off the sleigh when it gets down to crunch time. Maybe it was too cold for her on your sleigh, so you thought later might be better. I can totally understand that! Did I mention it’ll be as warm as 9 on Friday? I think that’s perfectly acceptable weather for my rain check!
P.S… About that kid that wants a hippopotamus for Christmas… I think he’s being completely irresponsible about it, and that I should get MY wish first!!
Dear Easter Bunny,
Thank you for last years chocolate supply. I really appreciated it, especially during those “darker” months. On Max and Ruby, you leave them a Gold chicken. Munchkin has been known to receive a gift or two at the end of an Easter egg hunt. So… if its not too much trouble, one fuzzy soft pink egg would be MORE then appreciated…. but if you don’t have pink, blue will be just incredible!
Dear Sperm Fairy,
I know we’ve got some hurdles to get over, but it’s nothing you haven’t been able to accomplish before!! I’m not asking for a lot here, just a few measly super swimmers to get on the move! You work your magic all over the world millions of times over… all I need is 1… well… 1 now and 1 later… Come ON!!
I know over the last year I’ve asked a lot from you! I’ve tried to make deals, promises, bargains, and you kept telling me to be patient. I know I looked at the clock, tapped my fingers, stomped my feet and screamed “NOW!” and you hugged me and said “not yet”. I know our priorities aren’t always the same. I know you’re interested in preparing me… and I’m interested in the here and now. I KNOW that your timing and my timing are different. So I’m not going to ask you like I did the others. At least not for that. If now is my time, my chance, my turn, then YAY! Wow! Awesome! But if its not, I’m going to need a lot of help because it’s all I think about. It’s the pretty much the only thing I dream about. And I know McHubby loves me with all his heart, but I think when I’m ready to cry at the opening sequence of The Simpsons just because they show an egg getting fertilized, that McHubby MIGHT get a worn with all the crying and pouting and sad. So if its not now, not for a long time, I’m going to need your help, because right now I don’t even want to get out of bed to face the day(s).
The UCK has hit my house too!! Munchkin and I had to leave church this AM after the first song, and lucky we did because we almost didn’t make it to the nearest trash can!
He’s feeling better right now, but school registration is tomorrow AM, so we’ll see how that goes over. Thankfully it sounds like he’ll just be in for registration, and then starting on Tuesday, so I still get a chance to learn the route, and get over whatever is hitting both of us!
Can I just ask you, all my American friends, why you never mentioned the marvelous wonder that is Therma Flu? I took it this AM after church, and it was like drinking some pretty strong
booze punch. My body got warm and tingly, and the room started to do this fuzzy slow motion thing when I turned my head, and within minutes, I was out cold!! I woke up feeling 10000% better, except the Stomach portion of this UCK is lingering. The good news is that the whole “loose a person” I committed to doing this year may happen a whole lot quicker if the UCK stays another day.
Speaking of, I stepped on the scale yesterday. I’m a whole lot closer to a number I NEVER thought I’d be in my LIFE, and it scared the diet into me! Bad news, I’m an emotional eater, and my family is facing a WHOLE pile of emotion as McEldest prepares to move back “Home”.
Pray that everything goes well for Munchkin tomorrow, and that things become clearer for McEldest, and for all of us as a family as life curve ball #9 hits.
I’m off to make McOfficiallyHubby watch his 5th episode of Bridezilla. I figure if he sees all the craziness these women channel, my antics wont seem so bad 😛
I promise to drop by and comment on everyone soon. I know I’ve been a bad bad commenter, but life is slowly starting to get into a routine here.