The Hubs and I are at a conference this week. A relaxing meet in St Augustine Florida, or so it should be. These never have been my idea of relaxing. Being at one of these always puts me back in high school. Never quite sure of myself, and always feeling more comfortable on the outskirts.
There’s the popular crowd, the cheerleaders or football players who know everyone, and who everyone turns to to get their cues.
Then theres the “regular people”. The ones who float from group to group, at ease wherever they are. (truth be told, they are the ones I envy most).
We have the Brown-nosers, The ones who campaign for popularity. Who shake everyone’s hand, say “How are you?” and then walk on before they hear your answer. (truth be told, these baby kissers are the ones I try my hardest to avoid). I think the how are you? Is my biggest pet peeve. Don’t ask because it’s polite. Ask because you care. And believe me. People know the difference.
Then there are the rest of us, not quiet in a group. The newbies, the ones who are struggling, the ones who would rather be home, with our families, with our guys. We can’t stop thinking about the work piling up and the stuff waiting for us at home while others dream of rolling golf courses.
We moved a lot as kids, The Hubs and I. So this new kid feeling… Its not so new to me. But new AND big groups? Ugh!! I hate big groups. My anxiety disorder makes it hard for me to put myself out there and be the one to make the first move. At work, with our guys, its different. Theres a level playing field of sorts. We all have our issues, and as the guys work on theirs, I work on mine. We support each other through the hard days. So being the new kid has always sort of just been my thing.
This morning I woke up to an blog alert from a “co worker”. This blog post… It echoed my own heart. It was really strange because our groups could not be further from each other. In fact, in the 2 years we’ve worked “together”, we’ve yet to speak to each other. Not even a hello.
Maybe, underneath it all, we’re all just a group of high school kids, trying our best to fit in.